Rushing Against the Clock

If there is one thing in my relationship with my five year old daughter Chloe that has been bugging me almost on a daily basis, that would be her procrastination. As probably any small child, she’s taking so (and I mean soooo!) much unbearably long time to do simple basic things like letting me brush her teeth, help her get dressed, put her to bed, etc.

I would be like: “Chloe come let me brush your teeth…It’s getting late! Chloe! Look at the time! (getting impatient, dreaming of all the things I would do for myself once she’s finally asleep). If you come now we will have time to read a book (bribing). Chloe where are you? You will get a cavity if we don’t brush your teeth (threatening).  Ok, let me piggy back you to the bathroom (using brute force).  Ouch! You’re too heavy! Why can’t you just walk? (frustrated). Hey, where are you running off to again? Oh, now that I’ve started brushing your teeth you have to go pee, NOW? (almost raising my voice). Can you wait till I finish? (getting really frustrated). Chloe, how long are you planning to just sit on the toilet? Come back to brush your teeth”…. And on and on it goes…..

Well today, I have to come to a realization. This is bugging me because, I, myself, never stop to smell the roses. I always rush from one thing to another, day after day, weeks after weeks. And it never ends. I simply never slow down. Even in my little down time that I have, I manage to squeeze learning piano, or  foreign language, take an online course and often all three one after another in less than an hour! (20 minutes each). On top of that, of course, I do all the mom things – cooking, cleaning, chauffeuring kids around the city from school to activities, running errands and on it goes. In short, I constantly rush against the clock to cram as many activities as possible in one day.

Today, I realize, that while above rushing and doing actually brings me pleasure (I love to do so many things!), Chloe is not like me. She likes to take time. She likes to stop and smell the roses. She is often, if not always, in the present moment and doesn’t have this mental list of the next 100 things to do today. In short, she is teaching me to slow down and respect her. She is not procrastinating. She is enjoying what she is doing in the moment, and it’s me (ME!) – who is forcing her to stop her activity to do something I ask her of.

I am now much more mindful of this, and even though I won’t change overnight, I will do my best to give Chloe more time to do simple things, to enjoy the peace of the present moment, to at least once a day not rush her. “Chloe – you want to sit on the toilet with toothpaste in your mouth? Ok, take your time sweetie. I’ll be standing here waiting for you as long as you need me to.”